‘We used grief to motivate ourselves’: The healing grind behind Browns & Co Coffee

Customers wouldn’t know it from the warmth of her greeting or the beaming smile behind the coffee machine, but there’s a double-shot of grief at the heart of Jess Millan’s fledgling venture in Feilding.

There is healing and fortitude in it too.

It’s right there in the name, Browns & Co Coffee, which opened on Kimbolton Rd as a bonafide takeaway coffee shop this month following earlier incarnations as a caravan and a repurposed container.

The moniker is a tribute to Millan’s late father, Les Bowness, who everybody knew simply as “Brown”. He died from a heart attack in April 2020, at the age of 57.

A picture of him adorns the front window.

“That photo is from the last day I spent with him, and the day we buried my kid’s dad, so that’s why it’s quite meaningful.”

Fifteen days before Millan lost her dad, her son Ryleigh’s father died suddenly. Both traumas were during the first Covid lockdown, adding an extra sting of isolation.

The 33-year-old spoke candidly of her despair and its impact on her mental health.

She was lost, feeling she had nowhere to go. Disenchanted with her job, working in accounts at Humphries Construction, she quit.

“I had a year off and didn’t know what I was doing … I had had numerous jobs, but could never really find my feet.”

Millan eventually found inspiration in her aunty’s hospitality business in Auckland, Little Doozy Caravan Bar, that catered parties with cocktails.

“I thought what a cool idea. How can I do this, and make money during the day? And that’s how Little Brown’s caravan came about.”

Millan knew she could work fast and multitask, and her father had always thought of himself as a coffee connoisseur.

“I struggled to come up with a name. I suppose we used grief to motivate ourselves.”

The caravan on Denbigh Square, which opened in March 2022, did an encouraging trade, but Millan struggled for a sense of security because the district council would only issue fortnightly permits.

That prompted a move into a repurposed freezer container on Weld St four months later, before then jumping at the opportunity to move around the corner into the strip mall opposite Countdown supermarket.

The block of shops, which in recent years had featured a bottle shop, a tobacconist, a takeaways and a headstone store, was affectionately referred to by locals as “death row”, but Millan could see merit in the location.

“I really wanted to stay this side of the [train] tracks, because there’s so much business, and the parking is so limited in town.

“And I wanted to cater for this side; accessible, fast takeaway coffee for Feilding. Make it really informal, fast pace.

“The hairdresser [next door] has said the vibe has changed, and soon a yoga place is going in next to us.”

Millan was also keen to maintain proximity to the Harley-Davidson store, whom she had worked with for charity rides promoting youth causes and suicide prevention.

The move appeared to be paying off. The typically barren car park was a hive of activity when Stuff dropped by, Millan on a first-name basis with most of her customers.

She said her sales volume had doubled and patrons were loving the easy and ample parking.

On Friday bagels were added to the menu, each option incorporating her father’s nickname.

Millan said no-one else in town was selling bagels and there was a lack of takeaway whole foods – with only fast food on offer.

She would be sourcing fresh bagels from Breadworks in Palmerston North, that would be toasted on a griddle, with a range of fillings, available Thursday to Saturday.

“We’ll also be doing toasties, bacon butties. Simple food, easy to take away, and easy to eat in a car. The bagels will be served in two halves, rather than like a burger.”